The Nabilah's Side: Journey

It all begins when I posted a photo of Hyde around 2017 said that how really thankful I’m for having him as the reason why I keep fighting my depression all these years and he is my saviour in battlefield (Depression).

Right after I posted this one of a friend mine asked if I could told her my story to her how can Hyde save me depression. So I reply to her comment said “In private” she understand that. We start our conversation in Messenger I told her since when I met Hyde from where, who old I was, by how and so on it’s really from A to Z told her. She was get shocked at first but then she feel amaze by my story. I remember something what she said to but not exactly (laugh) “ It can happen with other fans and other artist and to you it was Hyde that connected. So that is special.” Since then we start talking like to each other.

Early in on this year she surprise me with totally big news to me when a she shared a post there a post Hyde going held a concert in Malaysia and I was like finally Malaysia on map (tears of joy). The big news that my friend told is HYDE Acoustic Concert Tour 2018 黒ミサ Asia Live in Kuala Lumpur was held on 12 MAY 2018. This is where my journey started how did I managed to go to Hyde concerts.

Eagerly knowing it without any words I started make move but I asked my mom permission at first she said “You can go but I won’t give any single kind of help” I’m just “Okay” because I know there no way will allow me. I’m just fuck it my life totally mess after all who cares plus I’m a sinner. I’m still passionate to make this happen I started to think when the last time I make crazy thing that shocked my whole family?. Since my mom said like that she won’t help me a bit. From there God help me to archive this dream of mine somewhere, somehow I got a money and I being sponsor by my hydeist friend from Italy. Alhamdulillah I finally purchase the ticket even at first my aim was VIP ticket but I couldn’t get it so at least I go Zone A ticket can make me happy.

TICKET ARRIVAL AND MY EPILEPSY

This part was the hardest during this journey. During my ticket arrival my mom asked do not take that ticket from the Ticker Charge people and the Ticket Charge called me on that but I didn’t take called since I was on meds. After I wake I was a miscalled from unknown number well usually I won’t call back if that a unknown number but that something move me to call back that number. When I call he said he from Ticket Charge he was going back from my house since my family I wasn’t at home. I don’t want to get things more worst I asked that person if he could come back tomorrow and he yes around the he called or maybe a bit early or late, I said to him it’s okay. I really in tears that he could come back tomorrow just to send my ticket back.

Luckily on tomorrow my family had to go to clinic and I had left alone so took that chance to take my ticket but before they go I to pretend sleeping for a while since he not coming yet. After my family go to the clinic and I “woke up” and wait just a bit more for him to come. When I asked to him who said that I wasn’t home that she looked like me and he said yes just she a little bit shorter than me.. okay that women is my sister. When he said like all kind of feeling were mixed up sad, anger just everything mixing up. That ticket charge person were like “Are you okay Miss?” but I him stay any longer and my family come back I said to him “Thank you for coming back here and the ticket. See ya.”

The nightmare doesn’t end yet I don’t know how they know I ready got my mom ticket so my mom family took and hide it somewhere I had a big fight with her. My relationship with her getting more worst than before but that doesn’t stop from going it. I never asked anything before I even understand that my family is poor so by going to Hyde I work on it alone without any single help from her than suddenly she making this me. To me this really heartbroken why can she never have in little faith me while I never asked anything.

MY EPILEPSY

When I heard about Hyde going to held a concert in Malaysia I was just a week or two discharge from hospital. And during I purchasing the ticket I just few days discharge from hospital. I know my epilepsy is the biggest reason why she didn’t allow at first place but doesn’t mean she had to all that right. There a better way to forbid me why not we negotiate with each other rather fighting like this. Okay let me show all those of in hospital as prove

As you can see each month I had epilepsy until my family losing hope on me. They can’t do anything on me neither mine. Back to journey story after I discharge I continue on my mission. My friend who surprise help as much as her could to me make me going. Until this thing happen to me

Another ticket for my brother due to my condition and my brother agree (he had to) to go with me. A day before this I has seizure many times even before going to this concerts I had for few times until the makeup that I that plan I couldn’t make it that time. My body isn’t too strong to fight but somehow I got my spirit up to continue this journey until the end. Until managed to go to HYDE Acoustic Concert Tour 2018 黒ミサ Asia Live in Kuala Lumpur. From this I met a lot amazing people with me. I really enjoy the concert as I could until I forget I was sick, I screaming shouting Hyde’s name even I shy at first later the shy was gone. Bonus point is Hyde notice that night for few times.